Chocolate cravings are difficult, abstaining from caffeine is hard (especially in the morning), and doing without my favorite carbs is horrible. But none of that compares to the most difficult part of this journey.
No, I'm not talking about exercise, although it's still not my favorite. I'm thinking more along the line of learning to like myself. This has become the most difficult and arduous part of this whole process.
I have a wonderful, loving husband, and an amazing son; so I must be an okay person for them to put up with me. I can't be all that bad.
I am getting there, I'm proud of myself for the strides I've made and I am looking into going back to school (so I must think I deserve that). I'm thinking it's a baby step type of thing.
I started slow, just decided to give myself a break if I made a slip. I began to give myself the same rah-rah speech I gave everyone else. You know what? It is actually a pretty good one! I felt much less guilty and horrible afterwards. I let the slip go and just got back on track.
I'm trying to look at what I have accomplished instead of how much I have yet to do! I discovered that this is a really good motivator. I know there is a bunch of weight yet to come off; but that does not lessen the hard work and effort I have already put in.
The makeup gave me a boost and I am taking more time with my appearance, that is making me feel better about myself. I thought I was silly at first, but it really does make me feel good about myself and the day when I head out in the morning.
Learning to like yourself for perhaps the first time in your life is difficult. The only advice I have is give yourself a break and take baby steps. Everyone else loves you, you must be worthy of your own attention!
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