Changes

I had to go to physical therapy today.  Whenever I go to therapy, I end up with a migraine; it has to do with something they are doing with my neck and shoulders.  I'm putting up with it as it is actually helping my arm.  I can straighten my elbow for the first time in almost 2 years!  Anyway . . . I had toast this morning and did not have my usual yogurt and flaxseed.

So, here I am driving home, as quickly as I can, because the migraine is simmering in my skull, and suddenly, all I could think about was grease.  I wanted greasy food, ice cream, and chocolate.  Now, I know that I've written about this before; but what surprised me today was that on Sunday when I drove by the ice cream stand I wanted nothing to do with it.  Today, I considered driving into it as that would make it easier to access the soft-serve machine.  (Not a sane thought, I know, but I was under the influence of a migraine!)

How can I hit those two extremes in three days?  I know I'm moody, but come on!  That is ridiculous!  I was handling everything so well on Sunday!  What happened?

My mood.  My emotions.  I am an emotional eater.  I feel like I'm admitting to some sort of addiction here.  My mood changes, or I don't feel good and automatically my body says "We want sugar, chocolate and whatever starchy comfort food you can find."  

Is there a store somewhere where you can find a new internal system?  I want one that when I am depressed or sick says "Go forth and eat more vegetables!  Flaxseed is your friend.  Exercise will make you feel better!"  Where do I go to get that?