The last couple of weeks have been pretty much miserable. (Except, of course, for my anniversary!) I just realized that I have been conducting a sort of experiment; subconsciously.
First I was sick, never a good time. I couldn't eat or taste anything. When I did eat all I wanted was greasy junk and sugary crap. Yup, good old comfort food. Since I generally felt like I wanted to die, I didn't really care what I ate.
Then, I wanted to redo my two-week fast start but had trouble with the computer and then didn't go grocery shopping. (Oh my, I do believe the Empress of Justification is attempting a reappearance!)
So, needless to say, I have not been a good girl in regards to my eating plan. I realized that tonight when I found myself sampling some french fries and then informed the boy that I wanted cake.
I was going to start beating myself up when I realized something. I've been eating crappy stuff the last couple of weeks. I have been feeling crappy the last couple of weeks. My attitude has been crappy the last couple of weeks. Do you think there could be a correlation?
I'm now wondering if I behave and eat on plan for the next couple of weeks, will my attitude improve? Will I feel better and not want to slam people into walls?
I think I'll try it!
I always wonder what comes first, the mood/feeling, or the thing we attach/blame it to. Do we feel crappy and then 'recognize' something that 'fits,' so quickly that we think something is to blame when the chicken really came before the egg?? I mean this in wide sweeping ways too, not just individual occurrances. Life choices and choices of relationships (like people who subliminally get into relationships with people who are bad for them). I just don't know. I think its true, but don't know to what extent. ~a p.s. I do believe that we can recognize this and will ourselves to counteract it.. to defy Myron so to speak.
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